The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
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