Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
You've changed since you got that strap on
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
