I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
