Porn is love you can see.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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