How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
