I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
