Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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