I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
