we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
