Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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