Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
