how can u be prego again
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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