Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
