My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize