The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
The Olympian is in my bed
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
