I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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