people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
