Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize