i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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