He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Randomize
