I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
