I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
