So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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