There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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