Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Randomize
