And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
