D3 body, D1 cock
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
