I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
is this the sara with the beer cane?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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