Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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