PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
