And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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