Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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