look no pants
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
