He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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