I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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