Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize