He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
