Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
