just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
