So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
be right there i have to get my cape
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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