He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
