i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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