i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
