at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
