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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Big sunglasses are the new paper bag

  (817): View more from Texas

  ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.

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• (943): View more from

  You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.

  (406): View more from Montana

  Hospital.

  (509): View more from Washington

  I am invincible.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!

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• (917): View more from New York City

  He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  you are a true champion. bear my children.

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