Rock
Scissors
Fuck
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
