Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
