I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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