Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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