So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Fuck me I smell like cheese
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
