i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
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