i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
